Present

It is Monday night and I'm sitting in my pool listening to music. I have a picture of Mike by me candles and a glass of wine. I can't stop crying it has almost been a year since Mike left us and it has gotten to me. Why wouldn't it he was the love of my life. Now I need to continue on without him. Please let me vent. I won't do anything stupid. I can so picture him here with me. The water is warm and the moon and stars are out. There isn't enough wine to kill the pain and loneliness I feel. He was so beautiful and funny and kind. How can I not ache inside. I so want to leave this pain but it just keeps coming back. I don't want to go back in the house. At least out here I might be that much closer to him. I know that I will be fine in the morning but tonight I feel a part of me is gone.